Thanks Naomi. This says it all!

I have added a few comments as HDH…

Quote

1. TURN SIGNALS WILL GIVE AWAY YOUR NEXT MOVE. A CONFIDENT ALBERTA DRIVER AVOIDS USING THEM.

Added by HDH - Besides, it is nobody’s business where you are going!

2. UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCE SHOULD YOU MAINTAIN A SAFE DISTANCE BETWEEN YOU AND THE CAR IN FRONT OF YOU, BECAUSE THE SPACE WILL BE FILLED IN BY SOMEBODY ELSE, PUTTING YOU IN AN EVEN MORE DANGEROUS SITUATION.

3. THE FASTER YOU DRIVE THROUGH A RED LIGHT, THE LESS OF A CHANCE YOU HAVE OF GETTING HIT.

Added by HDH - Don’t slow down for an orange light! The asshole behind you wants to run the red!

4. WARNING! NEVER COME TO A COMPLETE STOP AT A STOP SIGN. NO ONE EXPECTS IT AND IT WILL RESULT IN YOUR BEING REAR-ENDED.

5. NEVER GET IN THE WAY OF AN OLDER CAR THAT NEEDS EXTENSIVE BODYWORK, ESPECIALLY WITH B.C. OR SASK, PLATES. WITH NO INSURANCE, THE OTHER OPERATOR HAS NOTHING TO LOSE.

6. BRAKING IS TO BE DONE AS HARD AND LATE AS POSSIBLE TO ENSURE THAT YOUR ABS KICKS IN, GIVING A VIGOROUS, FOOT MASSAGE AS THE BRAKE PEDAL VIOLENTLY PULSATES. FOR THOSE OF YOU WITHOUT ABS, IT’S A CHANCE TO STRENGTHEN YOUR LEG MUSCLES.

7. NEVER PASS ON THE LEFT WHEN YOU CAN PASS ON THE RIGHT. IT’S A GOOD WAY TO PREPARE OTHER DRIVERS ENTERING THE HIGHWAY.

8. SPEED LIMITS ARE ARBITRARY FIGURES; GIVEN ONLY AS A SUGGESTION AND ARE NOT ENFORCEABLE IN ALBERTA DURING RUSH HOUR, ESPECIALLY IN CALGARY.

9. JUST BECAUSE YOU’RE IN THE LEFT LANE AND HAVE NO ROOM TO SPEED UP OR MOVE OVER DOESN’T MEAN THAT AN ALBERTAN DRIVER FLASHING HIS HIGH BEAMS BEHIND YOU DOESN’T THINK HE CAN GO FASTER IN YOUR SPOT.

10. ALWAYS BRAKE AND RUBBERNECK WHEN YOU SEE AN ACCIDENT OR EVEN SOMEONE CHANGING A TIRE.
THIS IS SEEN AS A SIGN OF RESPECT FOR THE VICTIM.

11. LEARN TO SWERVE ABRUPTLY WITHOUT SIGNALING. ALBERTA IS THE HOME OF HIGH-SPEED SLALOM-DRIVING; THANKS TO THE DEPARTMENT OF PUBLIC WORKS, WHICH PUTS POT-HOLES IN KEY LOCATIONS
TO TEST DRIVERS’ REFLEXES AND KEEP THEM ALERT.

12. IT IS TRADITION IN ALBERTA TO HONK YOUR HORN AT CARS IN FRONT OF YOU THAT DO NOT MOVE WITHIN THREE MILLISECONDS OF THE LIGHT TURNING GREEN.

13. TO AVOID INJURY IN THE EVENT OF A COLLISION OR ROLLOVER, IT IS IMPORTANT TO EXIT YOUR VEHICLE THROUGH THE WINDSHIELD RIGHT AWAY. WEARING YOUR SEAT BELT WILL ONLY IMPEDE YOUR HI-VELOCITY
ESCAPE FROM DANGER.

14. REMEMBER THAT THE GOAL OF EVERY ALBERTA DRIVER IS TO GET AHEAD OF THE PACK BY WHATEVER MEANS NECESSARY.

Added by HDH - This is especially true when you are going 90 in a 100 zone and the truck you are passing is going 105. Make sure you hit your brakes hard to get back to 90 as soon as you pass the truck. You will receive a polite salute and get to hear what an air horn sounds like.

15. IN ALBERTA, ‘FLIPPING THE BIRD’ IS CONSIDERED A POLITE SALUTE. THIS GESTURE SHOULD ALWAYS BE
RETURNED.

THANK YOU FROM, THE ALBERTA REGISTRAR OF MOTOR VEHICLES

Naomi

 

The entry Talking about Rules for Alberta Drivers by John Winslow, unless otherwise expressly stated, is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Share Alike 2.5 Canada License.

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